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Crafting, birds, painting…but not necessarily in that order

Posted by :bcjen On : November 6, 2012
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I can’t believe I haven’t posted since September.  Geesh, what a slacker!!!  I blame Than.

He’s not around to read that so it’s ok.

Where oh where have I been you ask?  Well, even if you haven’t asked I’m going to tell you.  I’ve been homeschooling Than, taking care of our 2 new family members (the cockatiels, Izzy & Sky), attempting small crafts here and there and painting like I knew what I was doing.

That’s pretty much my entire life.  Ok, that and getting diagnosed with 2 new diseases and a new “syndrome”.  (sigh)  It’s always an adventure being me.  You wonder why I’m so weird.  I know you do.  It’s ok.  I accept the weirdness.  I EMBRACE it, actually.  Gotta laugh so I don’t cry or some other maudlin Hallmark saying.  I miss this blog.  Why did you, dear reader, make me stay away?  It’s your fault as well as Than’s.  Heck I’ll even blame Big Daddy as he NEVER reads this site.  He’s an anti-crafter.  Plus he doesn’t want to know what deep, dark family secrets I’m sharing on the web.

So first off, here’s Izzy & Sky’s YouTube page (it’s also Than’s YouTube page that he makes of his different plush toys doing goofy things that only a 9 year old boy would get).  He has fun doing it so I say, “film away!”.  If you want to just see the Izzy & Sky stuff you can search the videos on our channel using the words “Izzy & Sky”.

Then, of course, I had to come up with an Izzy & Sky FaceBook page.  I would SO love if you, invisible internet friends, would check it out and “Like” it.  You never have to go back there ever again, but a “Like” would make me so happy.  It might make me feel better about my horrible crafting skills if you just take pity on me and “Like” the Izzy & Sky page.  No guilt here, nope, none at all (doing the Scooby Doo hurt paw thing…you just have to imagine me doing it to get the idea).

Here are some pics of the birds for your viewing pleasure.  Or just because you have to since you’re already on my blog.  Either way…LOOK AT THEM!  LOOK!  LOOK! SEE?  SEE THEM?

Izzy’s the white-faced boy and Sky’s got the orange cheeks.  We LOVE them.  I won’t go into much about them as that’s why I provided why the links to their YouTube channel and the FB site.

Also I’ve been painting a bit.  Here’s some pics of those (and yes, as in my crafts, I find things on Google and paint my versions of them.  If something I’ve done looks like something of yours, take it as a compliment.  And know that I do NOT sell the things that are taken from an idea I saw on the web.  I give those away. LOL)

   

This next one was commissioned by a friend for a dear friend of hers who is fighting a battle against the evil monster cancer.  I was so blessed to be able to do this one:

I did this one for our dear friends little girl who has a Hello Kitty bedroom.  I still need to get my butt over there and give it to her!  I did it earlier in like July and still haven’t taken it over (that slacker thing again):

I also started making neck pillows for family members.  Ok so I’ve only made one for me and Than so far, but I fully intend to make one for my mom and anyone else who can provide the material and not care that I’m a crappy sewer.

This one is mine:

And this is Than’s:

  Yes the are intentionally shaped like this because for some reason it doesn’t hurt where my syrinx is (cervical spinal cord – that’s neck, not cervix. ROFL)

Here’s one of Big Daddy’s bday presents: (he’s a HUGE Raider fan)

I have another painting (my first big one) around here.  Hmmm (rummages around brain, computer, etc to find it):

Ah!  Here it is!

I figure that’s enough of the picturepalooza.  And hey, I’ll try not to let another zillion.5 months go by before sharing the weirdness that is me.

 

So…yea…I’m still alive…

Posted by :bcjen On : September 11, 2012
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Ok, so I said I’d be back with the site all nice and updated and all that jazz.  However, I did not expect to have all that has happened to have happened in short amounts of time.

Because life is so busy here’s the Jen Quick Version (ever after known as the JQV…someone remind me of that…)

 

1.  We adopted 2 cockatiels – Izzy (boy, white faced, age 3, Than’s pet) and Sky (female, normal colors, age 13 and mine)

a.  So in love with these two.  Izzy is dumber than a box of rocks but so adorable we ignore the stupidity.  He throws himself off the perches because he doesn’t like to climb around.  He’s not very good at it and will fall 8 out of 10 times.  We have come to call him “The Meat Brick” but we adore him so that’s come to be a term of endearment. LOL  He hurts himself by falling and I’ve come to tears sometimes when he flings himself off the perch because he’s too damn lazy to climb down.  He scares me if only because I don’t want him hurt.  He literally did something to a wing feather where he BLED (tiny drops).  You’d have thought he cut his head off by me and Than’s hysterics.  Good thing the guys at the rescue are so incredibly awesome.

Wanna adopt an exotic bird in Phoenix?  Arizona Exotic Bird Rescue is the ONLY place to go.  But don’t think it’s a place where you can just walk in, fork over some money and walk out with a bird.  Oh no…they are very much considerate of the bird and will make sure it’s a good fit.    They couldn’t talk me down over the phone once Iz was bleeding so they dropped everything they were doing and drove over to my house.  He was fine when they got here but they came and calmed me down and talked to Than and I.  I love those guys.  Curt and Tyler…tell them Jen sent you.  They know me.  We collect newspapers and food for them sometimes.

 

b.  Sky is super, super smart and very adept at climbing.  EVERYTHING.  Including me.  She’s all sorts of awesome but also a diva.  You don’t touch her, unless she wants you to and she NEVER wants you to.  She will allow you to act as her personal taxi sometimes.  More often than not she will come crawl up my arm to my shoulder and ride around.  She will never let me pet her.  I’ll wear her down…oh yes….I will…  She’s an old broad, but since they can live to be 30 she’s not “too” old.  She’s all over the place.  She and I are seriously bonded, however she’d toss me under a bus if G would just pay her a little bit of attention.

He wants NOTHING to do with the birds.  They stay in the cage when he’s around (he is so not a pet person).  She sees him and she’s pining away for him.  Goes to the top of the cage and hangs upside down, chirps at him, follows him around (from inside the cage).  He just smirks because he knows she loves him with a passion that is almost holy.  Poor her.  She suffers thru me, but loves him.  The only thing she loves more than G is popcorn.  She’d toss her grandma off a cliff for some popcorn.  So she gets some a few times a week.

 

2.  Homeschooling.   Yep it’s that time of year where Than has to do schoolwork and I have to teach it.  4th grade this year.  We switched up curriculum and he’s now doing Switched On Schoolhouse.  We LOVE it!  School actually lasts a lot longer, but we’re ok with it.

3.  Painting.  I started painting on canvas.  I’ll inflict that bit o’mess on you all soon enough.

There’s more but I have seriously run out of time to type it.

Thanks for sticking around…eventually the insanity will be back.  Well I’m always a nutter, but I’ll be one in public soon enough.

Be afraid…be very afraid

Posted by :bcjen On : July 27, 2012
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Yesterday, I learned how to not only make the bobbin and thread it, but to actually USE my sewing machine.  After 6 years of never using it, the brand new outta the box machine got used.

You’ve been warned.

 

Actually G has been warned.  He’s putting out the warning to local emergency rooms and paramedics.  He’s telling them the first call should come any time now.

I just told him to sleep lightly and with one eye open.

 

I’m not good at it, (as if that stops me from oh, say…ANYTHING) but I know the basics.

 

Watch out world….and Hobby Lobby, JoAnn Fabrics and sometimes Michaels….

I

CAN

SEW!

Switching it up

Posted by :bcjen On : July 14, 2012
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Hey all, I’m in the midst of switching hosting servers, which means that there will be a bunch of attempts at new themes, etc going on here at badlycrafted.com.  Give me a little time and it’ll be all nice and spiffy.  The key word there is “Little”.  Actually that’s the JOKE word, because it’s me we’re talking about.  Procrastinator, thy name is Jen.

The tech stuff is being handled by the world’s best brother in law.  The design decisions are, unfortunately, being handled by me. Which means I can’t make up my mind.  Which means it’s anyone’s guess as to what the final product will look like and WHEN it’ll be finished.  Check back often to see when the new and improved badlycrafted.com is finished!

Oh…and wish me luck….

Me? A Crafter who actually SOLD STUFF?

Posted by :bcjen On : July 10, 2012
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So yeah, the craft fair that I was a part of was ok.  I made about $120.00.  I have a ton of tooth fairy pillows left.  Tomorrow I’ll be snapping pics and putting them up on my Etsy shop.  I still can’t believe people bought my stuff.  It’s hysterically funny to me.

In one of those, “Oh crap I hope they don’t get home and take a closer look at what they bought!”

Then Rational Jen swoops in, ‘Hey, they only paid $5.00 for it, it’s not like they were expecting Martha Stewart.  You even handed out cards to this website and it’s named “BADLYCRAFTED.  Think on that one Stoopy Jen.”

Stoopy Jen is sitting here, mouth hanging open with a vacant look on her/my face.  It’s how I roll lately.

Seriously, a few days ago I was sitting up in bed (G was over at his computer in our room and Than was in his own room asleep), playing “Draw Something” on my Kindle Fire.  Next thing I know I’m jerking myself awake as I’m about to tip over.  Yes, I fell asleep sitting up with the KF on my lap, stylus in hand and I was DROOLING.

DROOLING?  Yeah, yeah, tmi.  But it’s me and it’s this blog so there’s never really such a thing as “tmi” here.  We’re all friends, right? ;)

I mistakenly told G, ‘OMGOSH George, first…I just fell asleep sitting up, and then I almost fell off the bed!!”  He replied, “Did you know you were drooling, too?”

Me:  “Isn’t that something you should wake me up for?  I mean dang, at least push my forehead back so I fall straight back on my pillow and sleep.

G:  “As if you ever fell in a straight line in your entire life.”

He has a point.  But don’t tell him I said that.

 

I’ve been starting/finishing projects lately but mostly just starting projects.  I actually did crochet a baby blanket for a friend who had a sweet baby girl a few weeks back.  Here’s a pic of that:

It’s pretty, girlie and soft, soft, soft!  I’m actually happy with this one.  That’s a record of 1 in a row.

I also did a project I found on Pinterest.  You take Elmer’s glue and food coloring and paint it on glass.  It goes on really thick and gooey, but when it dries it’s cool looking:

Start to finish:

       

No I have no idea about measurements as I don’t measure.  Yes I didn’t mix really well and have streaky red bits in it.  And yes even though close up it’s not perfect, I’m still perfectly happy with it.  Just know if you paint it on really thick it’s going to slide down the sides into a big pile of goo.  I ended up turning it upside down in my kitchen sink – easier clean up that way.

I’m also starting signage for a local charity. I don’t have any pics of that yet.  I’ll put it up when I get ‘em.

On the home front, Than the Man and I are searching to buy a baby cockatiel.  G’s just letting us run wild on this.  We have a budget of zero dollars and zero cents.  (sigh)  Trying to work bartering out but not sure how that’ll go.  Doesn’t hurt to ask, eh?  We found that some of our favorite people from a pet shop that closed last year started up a new shop in Mesa.  The new shop is AWESOME.  Clean place, pet habitats are clean and the pets are extremely well cared for.  We can afford the pet once it’s in the house – it’s that start up costs that are crazy.  “WE” are learning “fiscal responsibility”.  By “WE” I mean Than.

The only problem with this is that he talks about nothing else and doesn’t stop talking.  All.day.long.  “Hi, cockatiel Mommy, cockatiel.  How cockatiel did cockatiel you cockatiel sleep cockatiel?

Mr. SubliminalFail, thy name is Than.

;)

 

Hello world!

Posted by :bcjen On : June 27, 2012
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Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!

Say Hello to my Little Friends….

Posted by :bcjen On : June 4, 2012
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After a marathon sewing session yesterday (after church/potluck), I now only have 15 more of these to make before the craft fair on 6/16!  I can’t believe that I, the Undisputed Queen of Procrastination, have created 35 of these bad boys!  Go me!  Seriously, though I’ve actually made 40 but 1 was for Than, 1 for a niece, 1 for a nephew, 1 to a girl at my dr’s office (one more for another girl up there, but I haven’t gone back up to give it to her yet.  And by “give” I mean just take it up there so she can buy it…).

And in other news, I wrenched my shoulder while patting myself on the back.
;)

 

Ok, so here’s the picture:

Fairly soon, I’ll be taking a sewing class (on the machine, even!).  Then my plot to take over the world will be in full swing….

The Long Road Home and the Tooth Fairy gets some help…

Posted by :bcjen On : May 22, 2012
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So…I’ve been gone from BC for awhile.  It’s been an eventful while.  One very bad thing happened and I ended up going home after 7 years.

Pull up a chair, this is gonna be a long one….

Backtracking a bit…  Every year in the Spring we put back money (and try to use Tax Return money) for me and Than to “try” to get back to Texas to visit family/friends.  It never works out.  Why?  Because every stinking Spring since we moved to Phoenix the price of gas goes thru the freaking roof.  Seriously…it was 3.00 a gallon when we started saving and was nearly $4.00 a gallon when time came to go.  Which rose airfare far too high and driving not feasible.

So, yet another opportunity passes us by and we can’t go.  I usually get a consolation prize outta this each year (using the money we saved) and this year was no exception.  This year I got a Kindle Fire.  I love it with all that is in me.  I play Words with Friends and Draw Something like my life depended on it.  I read USAToday on it, download books with the intention of reading (something about holding a book in my hand is still far more appealing), and watch Netflix movies on it.  I love my Kindle Fire like it’s a 2nd child.  It’s currently being called “My Precious“.  Every once in a while I let Than play Angry Birds on it, and sometimes I let G gaze on it from across the room.

Anyway, the decision had been made not to go back to Texas and the saved money was spent.  I was supposed to go to the wedding of a very, very dear girl (she’s 37, but will always be a girl to me) that I was a nanny to (along with her sister and brother) when I was 19-20.  Her mom is absolutely one of the best people I know and I consider the mom to be one of my best, dearest (pick an adjective that means really good things) people in my life.  Ever.  So not being able to go to this wedding was heartbreaking.  No Kindle Fire or shopping trip was going to make me feel better about it at all.

Then a nightmare happens.  I get a call at 3:30am on a Saturday morning from my mom telling me my cousin fell off the back of her Harley and was run over by a friend who was unable to stop in time.  My cousin wasn’t expected to live.  And I couldn’t get home.  A lot of things happened (that I won’t go into) and a friend GIVES me the money to go.  She, out of the blue, wrote me online asked if she could put the money in my bank acct so I could go home.  God works in mysterious ways.  You have no idea how much we are thankful for the friend who did this for us.

So Than and I packed up and went to Texas.  We went to the hospital (Than had to stay in waiting room while I went into ICU) and I was able to see/pray/etc with my cousin.  In.Tears.  But the fact that she was still alive 2 weeks after that accident and her liver that was nearly in 2 had started repairing itself was a miracle.  Lots of things happened – all miraculous, but this blog is not the time or place for all that occurred.  Suffice it to say we were all able to witness a miracle.  Shelly is alive.  And she’s currently in a rehab, long term facility awake, knows who she is and who everyone else is and she can speak (around her trach for now), has just started to stand and take baby steps and is 100% herself.  That accident was a horrible accident.  The fact that she lived is all due to God’s intervention.  So many lives have been touched by this horrible accident, you wouldn’t believe how many people are giving God the glory for all this.  And He richly deserves it because only God could have saved her AND brought her out of this completely herself.  One of these days I’ll start a seperate journal and share all that happened on this trip – it’s truly amazing.

We also got to go to the wedding.  The best part was the Saturday before the wedding, my friend Linda and I set Colleen (the bride) up.  Lin went to Coll’s house to help with wedding stuff and after Lin got there I parked down a bit and sent Than to the front door to see if Coll would “buy Cub Scout popcorn.”  She apologized to him and said she couldn’t and I popped out around the corner and asked, “What about from me, could you buy some from me?”  I think the neighbors heard that scream.  She nearly choked me to death hugging me.  It was awesome.  Her wedding was so perfect, she was a beautiful bride and it was really good to see so many people from her family that I hadn’t seen in years.  And Than and I spent two fantastic days out at Lin’s place and it was perfection.

The other days we were there we spent at my friend, Debbie’s (THANK YOU DEBBIE!) who handed me her house keys and said, “whatever you need.”  (Than literally cried his eyes out when we left Debbies.  They are going to be Skype buddies.  He loves her sooo much!  Me, too.  I’ve been friends with her since I was 15).  We also spent the last 4 days at my best friend, Suzanne’s.  That was sooo much fun.  Suz’ boy, Benji was born 20 days before Than but we moved away when they were 2.  We had a great time staying at their house with Suz, her husband, daughter and Benji.  Than wants to go back so he can hang with Benji.  He actually wants to MOVE back but that’s not in the cards. LOL

Ok, about the Tooth Fairy ( I bet you’re wondering if I’d ever get to the crafting part of this crafting blog, eh?)….  So there’s a used curriculum/craft fair coming up and I bought a table to sell my wares at.  My wares.  Yeah.  Me.  Selling stuff I’VE made.  Should be scary.  I’ve decided to make a bunch of those tooth fairy pillows and sell them for $5.00 a pop.  They’re small and I can normally make 1 an hour.  Now if I only had an hour to make one.

It’s what I’ve been doing lately instead of typing on here.  I told myself I needed 50 by the time the fair rolls around in mid-June.  I currently have 20 made.  I had more but I gave 1 to my niece and 1 to my nephew (the ones that live here), 1 to Than and I have 1 set aside for my friends son.  OH and I have one that I’m going to send to Alaska for my friends little girl.  But I also want to make her a flower baby felt doll.  I’ll share those here after I get ‘em done.

For now, here’s some of the tooth fairy pillows:

     

When I make tooth fairy pillows to put on my Etsy shop, someone remind me to photograph them separately on a light background so you can see the colors better.  You’ll do that for me, right?

 

PROJECT: Anime Box and rambling insanity

Posted by :bcjen On : April 18, 2012
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So, yeah…I suck, as in SUCK at drawing anime.  I give it a shot every once in a while and it’s worse than “badly”crafted.  It’s like someone gave a loaded paintbrush to one of those “smart” elephants and tries to tell you that the sloppy looking painted picture is something other than splashes of paint on a canvas.

Animal Handler:  “Look!  Harold the Wonder Elephant just painted the Mona Lisa!”

Me:  “Dude, that looks like the elephant held the brush in it’s trunk while you moved the canvas in circles.”

AH:  “No!  I didn’t move it in circles!”

Me:  “But you admit to moving the canvas as the elephant just stood there with a loaded paint brush in it’s trunk, right?”

AH:  “Well, yeah, but hey how many elephants out in the bush can paint?”

Me:  “How many elephants in the bush have had a loaded paintbrush handed to them?”

AH walks off grumbling about mouthy, smurf-lady who thinks she’s an art critic.

 

Um…where was I?  Oh yeah…anime and me sucking at it.  So, I’m under extreme stress right now with a bunch of crap going on.  Mostly it’s my very beloved cousin was in a terrible motorcycle accident in Texas and I’m trying to get my crap together for Than-the-man and I to drive out there.  Big Daddy can’t miss work so he can’t come.  He’s ok with that as he’s not the biggest fan of the best state in the world.  Psh!  Who needs him? Ok, so I do…

Um, where was I again?  Stop making me get off track people!  Yeah, I’m talking to you red haired guy with the glasses.  Stop making me get side-tracked.  And you, lady in the pj’s…it’s fricking 3 in the afternoon where you are…get up, get a shower, brush your teeth and go outside and live a little.  Spending all your time on the computer is not healthy.  There’s a whole world out there to explore!

(sigh)…see?  I’m so easily side tracked…remind me to tell you about the bank story….

Anyway, I can’t sleep.  Overly-anxious about getting to Texas just to be there. I LOVE my cousin.  She was my first hero.  I LOVE HER.  Have I mentioned how much I love her? So anyway I have this black box (it seems I paint all boxes black, eh?) and some really cool paint colors that I’ve picked up recently.  I decided to paint each side a different color and once that dries I’m gonna FORCE myself to perfect my anime drawing so that I can draw anime faces on each side – or I’ll just draw Pokemon type creatures on it.  Either way, I’m giving myself no way out of learning this stuff.

Here’s where I stand on the project as of now:

     

So there’s what all four colors are.  I left extra black space on the top as that’s where the box fits.  I haven’t measured off the sides of the box top yet so I can paint it like the sides with the thin black strip all the way around.  It’s late and I don’t want to attempt it.  I’m anxious, not insane.  There’s a difference buddy…slight, but still a difference.

And now, for something completely different (thank you Monty Python!)

Than and I went to the bank today.  For the 3rd time I’ve had to go in because they keep screwing up ordering our checks with the new address on it.  First time I went in, I changed the address and the banker ordered the checks for me (we get free ones with our acct.).  A week or so goes by, no new checks.  So I stop off in the bank and talk to a 2nd banker and he looks up my stuff and sees the address change but the 1st banker didn’t order the checks.  (sigh).  Ok so HE makes sure of the new address and orders my checks.  A week goes by.  I go to the mailbox and find the new box of checks! YAY!  Correct address on the outside of the box, but on the inside, the checks have the.old.address.

Really Wells Fargo?  You guys just can’t hire people to push buttons correctly or what?  So in the midst of all this very, very stressful time what with me getting a new disease (oh yeah, that’s Disease No. 4 for those keeping count), Shelly lying in ICU in Texas and me desperate to get there, I find that Wells Fargo bankers need lessons in how to push buttons correctly.

Today’s banker gets “Jen Who’s Had Enough And Is Completely Overwhelmed At This Point” (try fitting THAT on a business card!) She gets it all right and even calls the check printing company to make sure they are seeing the same info she’s showing in the  bank system.  Yep, it’s fixed.

Then I ask this banker, “Btw, where is Than’s Savings account money?  It’s showing a zero balance and we haven’t touched that account in over a year and it had at least $15.00 in it“.  She didn’t know.  No one can tell me.  I have their Research Dept figuring it out.

The banker chick then mentions this little gem to me:  “Btw, why aren’t you on your husbands Savings account?”

Me:  “I am.”

Banker:  “No, no you’re not.  And did you know that if anything happens to him you legally can’t touch the money? (it’s like $50.00)”

Me: “I am on that account.”

Banker:  “No, it shows right here he opened the account in 2008.”

Me:  (heavy sigh):  “No, I opened both the checking and the savings in Texas in 1999 the year we got married.”

Banker:  “We show you only opened a checking account.”

Me:  “Someone’s smoking crack and I can guarantee you it’s not me.“  She’s acting all conspirator-like…as if G was sneaking around on me opening up savings accounts and putting $50.00 in there.  So I call G at work and the 3 of us have this conversation that goes on and finally the Banker gets told by me and G that their dumb-ass bank made us switch our savings to a money market account in 2008 to avoid fees if we don’t keep a certain amount in the account.  She’s still denying that I opened a savings acct in Texas in 1999.

By this point (after we’ve hung up with G) I’m at the “I can’t take anymore stress” point.

So I snap.

COMPLETELY SNAP.

I don’t get mean.  I get goofy.  I just start laughing.  Hysterically.  Than’s sitting next to me, being a good boy the whole time this is all going on.  But then he sees me start to lose it and he gets mad.  At the banker.  And at Wells Fargo.  And my 9 year old son slams his hand down on her desk and GROWLS AT HER saying, “LOOK WHAT YOU GUYS DID!  YOU BROKE MY MOM!”  I am telling you right now – he REALLY DID THAT.

It made me laugh even harder.  It was so freaking funny.  I couldn’t stop laughing.  He got all momma bear protective.  He’s seen me take some pretty harsh hits lately with my health (esp. my health), this trip to Texas, etc., etc. and he just wants to wrap me in bubble wrap and not let anything else happen.  Meanwhile I have a target painted on me and people keep lobbing things at me.  I’m ok, though….God’s got my back.  And front.  But Than-the-man ain’t letting NOBODY mess with his mommy right now.

I had to make him apologize for freaking out the normal people.  Sometimes when we walk through stores and we do our normal weird stuff (Than’s Interpretive Dance in grocery stores is hysterically funny), I say, “Than stop…you’re freaking out the normal people.”  And we laugh our butts off.  But I have to teach him right from wrong and he had to know that growling at the banker wasn’t right.  She’s not the one who did it to me, it’s the bank as a whole.  I try hard to teach him to “never shoot the messenger”.

The kid’s getting an allowance raise though.

PROJECT: Before & After Flower Wall

Posted by :bcjen On : April 14, 2012
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Blank wall above my desk

BEFORE:

AFTER:

Got the idea from this really great blog I found.  She offered up the idea and template to readers and I went for it.  I’d have loved to use paper like she did, but I only had these papers available to me.

Maybe tomorrow I’ll attempt to take a better “AFTER” picture…..This is “badlycrafted.com” not “badlyphotographed.com” , although it should always be assumed that anything I attempt is going to be crappy in some form or another.