Than and I just had a very strange conversation… For clarity, Than will be “the smart one” and I will be..well…me.
He was sitting at my desk playing SPORE on my computer. He has SPORE on his computer AND on my laptop, but for some reason he wanted to play it on my computer. I think it’s because his headphones aren’t working (the kid goes through headphones like I go through sky blue marker pens) and I won’t let him take my headphones off of my computer.
So, he’s sitting at my desk. Ewenice is sitting on the printer next to my monitor. I’m walking around talking on the phone to Wendi discussing the Homeschool convention tomorrow.
I hang up with Wendi and yell, “THE EWE! SHE CAN’T BREATHE!”
Than rips the headset off and looks at me and says, “What Mommy? What’s wrong?”
Me: “Ewenice! I forgot to draw nostrils on her last night! She can’t breathe if she doesn’t have nostrils!”
The Smart One, in a very patient voice. The voice I’ve used on him countless times: “Mommy, she’s a stuffed animal. You can draw the nostrils on and she still won’t be able to breathe.”
Me: “This is no time for common sense, GET ME MY BLACK MARKER!”
So now Ewenice can breathe and I’ve confirmed to my 8 year old that me being a fun mom comes at the cost of sanity.